The God of the universe loves us.
and wants us to know him.
This morning I got up at five with Ben to make him breakfast and spend some time together before he left for work. I didn't have school today but it was worth waking up early to spend some time with him. After he left for work I took some time for myself. Just God, my Bible, the book Crazy Love, and my coffee. I haven't had a quite morning like this in quite awhile so it was such a filling time. The sun is rising now as I write this and I am overcome with how Big my God is and how insignificant I am. In Crazy Love, Francis Chan writes about how the Creator of the magnitude of the galaxies and the complexity of caterpillars desires for us to know him. I am amazed at how I can feel like it is so hard to see God at times, when the truth is he is in everything around me. Everything was created by God and for God. The beautiful frost on my patio outside and the warm colors bursting from the sky, and even the coffee that warms me every morning. God finds so many ways to make us feel loved and yet we often forget he is the creator of it all. It is too easy to wake up in the morning and forget who has given me the life I am living that very day.
It is frustrating sometimes when it seems that I cannot love God in the way that I know he deserves.
"Shouldn't it be easy to love a God so wonderful?"
"When we love God because we feel we should love Him, instead of genuinely loving out of our true selves, we have forgotten who God really is."
Francis Chan writes:
"we need [reminders] about God's goodness. We are programmed to focus on what we don't have, bombarded multiple times throughout the day with what we need to buy that will make us feel happier or sexier or more at peace. The dissatisfaction transfers over to our thinking about God. We forget we already have everything we need in Him. Because we don't often think about the reality of who God is, we quickly forget that He is worthy to be worshipped and loved."
...and the hardest part about trying to understand God is that I know he is too incredible to every fully understand. Chan also talks about what it means to be Holy. God is Holy therefor he is set apart and distinct from us. We can never fully understand who God is be cause he is so Holy. My mind will never be able to truly wrap around the entire concept of who God is. I love how Chan also talks about how comforting it is to know that we worship a God that we can not exaggerate. Anything I have to say about my God is an understatement. This is such a blaring reality when I compare this to the numerous exaggerations I could make about myself. Even thinking back to the resume I recently created I am struck by the pathetic exaggerations that we write down on paper. I have failures everyday. God, however will never fail me.
Out of my knowing I can never exaggerate God's goodness or love comes a desire for me to know him further. I need to realize that no I will never fully realize God's characteristics, but that to love God from my true self I need to strive to know him better each and every day. It may seem like a daunting task since It will never be completed, but I'm okay with that. In reminds me once again of God's graciousness. I will never know him perfectly, and he knows that...but he is also encouraging me to give my life to knowing him as complete as I can.